Waffen SS humour

Sepp Dietrich and one of his officers are in camping. They plant their Zeltbahn, they eat and go to bed. At midnight, Dietrich wake his officer up.
-Sturmbannführer?
-Yes, Sir?
-Watch to the stars and tell me what you think.
-Well, I see millions of stars, and thousands of them are planets. Maybe exists a planet with people like us in this fantastic univers!
-Sturmbannführer, you idiot! Somebody stole our tent!

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2 SS soldiers are in a fox-hole during the Battle of the Bulge. In the night:
-Hans?
-Ja?
-Are you masturbating?
-Yes, why?
-Can't you take YOURS?